In like a Lion, Out like a Lamb

SPRING HAS SPRUNG HERE!!!!!!

I cannot believe it. It is 73 degrees as I type this here in Anderson, SC. Earlier this week it was breezy and in the 50's. In just a few days it will be back to those temps before it warms again next weekend. I cannot wait until the temps stay stable. I'm ready to get back in the saddle for the Ride To Remember 2019. 

This year the old adage for March, "In like a Lion, Out like a Lamb" has been right on target as far as the weather is concerned. And for the dementia, I can say the same thing.

I mentioned in an earlier blog that I have now been put out of work on permanent disability. Frankly it stinks. I still wanted to work and tried my best to find a way, but by the first of this month is was becoming apparent that I was having trouble doing even the simplest things at work. Dementia was roaring at me, "I've got you now. I'll squash you like a bug." Truthfully I felt that it was faithfully carrying out its mission at the time. My job as an Analyst created a lot of stress and high pressure. I tried to find alternatives to my duties that I could do and still be a viable worker.

In the end my doctor and my bosses both agreed that the time had come.

Fast forward to now. I've been out of work for 2 weeks. My wife says I'm a different man. She says I am able to be more focused and a bit sharper. I will admit that I do feel a bit better too. I'm still a little bit bummed about not working now, but my focus has now turned into protecting what I have left of a brain and body. 

I'm like that lamb in the picture, I know the Lion is still there, but kinda chilling at the moment. I feel like I can lay my head down and rest for a minute, even if I'm still connected to the Lion. I know that connection will always be there unless a cure if found, but it isn't raging, trying to tear me down.

I'm also going to use this time to talk to others about my disease. Opportunities are opening up for me to do as such i.e. Alzheimers Coffee Talk Greenville, Alzheimers State House Day, Congressional Staff/Military Advisors, Local/National Company Annual Meetings just for April.

I know God still has a plan in all of this, and I just hope I can make him proud in what I do.

For now I will keep pushing on through this disease. 

For those of you reading this, please consider making a donation by following the link above. I really want a cure to be found soon so that I can have many, many more years to spend with my wife and friends. 

Until next time, #AlzSux, #EndAlz

 

Quiet, I said!

Why Are Alz/Dementia Patients So Quiet?

People who have dealt with someone who has either Alzheimer’s or Dementia find one of the most frustrating aspects when dealing with them is the “silent” times. I think most often people believe that person is lost in their own world, not capable of responding in a coherent manner at the time with the other person talking to them. I will admit with my grandmother that is how I looked at her when these moments happened. I didn’t know what to say or do, so I just remained quiet too. Now that I am dealing with this disease, I do not know if that was the correct response or not.

My wife says I can talk to a brick wall and enjoy the banter back and forth. (Think on that one for a minute.) One thing that I always believed that was special in our relationship was the fact that we talked a lot about our lives and things going on. I would always make comments about things on the TV or reflect on something that had just taken place in our household.

Now I find myself just sitting there, watching the TV. Sheri used to kid me … “quit analyzing that, you’re not supposed to do that with that show/commercial.” Now I rarely make a comment when watching a show. Frankly, I don’t even enjoy watching most of them anymore. It’s just a distraction for the moment. I find myself spending more of my time thinking about what is happening, what I can do and what the possibilities are for the future when I am quiet. I cannot say for your friend/family member that they are doing the same, but I suspect so. I believe most people are aware of what is happening to them, except maybe in the very end stages, but even then I wonder.

It isn’t the fact that I can’t carry on a conversation anymore. I still have plenty of them in my head. But when I try to talk about things, I tend to use the wrong words and then I find myself getting frustrated when I can’t finish communicating the rest of my story with Sheri. Bless her heart, she on the other hand has to play Pictionary, Charade’s and god know what else just to figure out what I’m trying to tell her. Sometimes it provides a pretty good laugh, other times, I just give up. And when the Hydrocephalus kicks in and I lose the ability to talk, then life really gets interesting. Thank goodness for text messaging. It allowed me to be able to talk with her easier than drawings or sign language (as in fingers, hand motions and other mickey mouse’s to get my point across.)

The best thing I can think of is to turn the TV off. Engage them in memories, because those are what we hold dear. Let them talk about what they enjoyed or why it excited them. Go touch them. Hold their hand. Sit down beside them. Personal contact can cause people to want to communicate, and that may be something that will start the conversation up. I know when my wife holds my hand or comes to sit by me it makes me feel better. The depression lifts and I feel much better. I believe other people can benefit likewise also.

So, until the next time we meet, Remember … #EndAlz #AlzSux #HydroWarrior4Ever