An Open Letter to Santa and God
Dear Gentlemen,
I know I am a bit old to be writing you, but this Christmas
the urge to do so was so overwhelming I feel that I have no other choice.
My Christmas present request this year is going to seem a
bit strange, and maybe a little strewn, but I want this Christmas to be the
most special that I have ever had.
This year has been a tough year on my family. After only 2 ½
months after opening our new business, we found ourselves staring at the New
Year. We were hopeful that this would be a new year filled with new promises
that would grant us a new start in life. We had only bought a house the past
summer, the shop a month later and with the Christmas season preparations at
the shop, hectic does not properly describe what our life was like during the
last few months of 2017.
The first quarter was slow and we were able to catch our
breath, though it was tough on the business end. Then in April we were hit by a
sledge hammer!
I’ll never forget that Sunday. I awoke to the oddest
sensation. I felt disconnected and my body wouldn’t stop twitching. The only
thing Sheri could do was lay there and hold me. Neither one of us understood
what was going on. We had just celebrated our friendship with a really great
family the previous evening. I had grilled burgers and hotdogs and we had made
s’mores. Life seemed great. Now, I could only wonder if that was my last time
to celebrate anything.
Luckily our friend is an RN at a Neurologist’s office and we
were able to be seen on Monday. Tests were ordered, including an MRI and we
awaited the results.
June 26, 2018
We went to the office to get the results of the tests.
Needless to say, we weren’t prepared. Not just 1 incurable disease, but 2.
Early Onset Dementia and Hydrocephalus. My son has Hydrocephalus from birth
complications and my grandmother had dementia, so I’ve seen the results of both
up close and personal.
Hey guys, my wife has had to endure a lot since we married 8
years ago. She had to endure 2 knee replacements (1 that had to be redone, so i guess it makes 3 in total), job loss, and a husband who
has been up and down with his back injury, then a heart valve problem and now
this.
It isn’t fair! I know, life isn’t fair, I get that! But
dang, how much does she have to go through for it to be fair. We have always
hoped to spend our retirement years in the mountains of either NC or TN. We
even bought some land to build a house on. Now I don’t see that happening. The
area is too remote for the medical care I will need as we go along through the years.
Now, getting down to the nitty gritty, or my Christmas wish.
My wife told me one of the trademarks to this disease is a
loss of taste. We were sitting in an Italian restaurant the other Sunday when I
remarked to her that nothing tasted right. Everything seemed to be bland. I
make a killer Chicken Enchilada Soup that has a kick to it, but it is still
really good. It tasted like the chicken walked through it when I fixed it recently. The Veal Parmesan that I always loved was tasteless as I sat there and
ate. The only thing I enjoy eating any more is sweets, but even then I can only
stand them in moderation because after a few bites the sweet part is
overwhelming.
I had really hoped that I would be on the slow end of this
disease. Now I’m not so sure, and it scares me sorta. I’m not afraid to die.
God, you know that part of it and I know you will welcome me home. Sometimes
going home doesn’t sound like a bad idea either when I think of the burden I
could become to my friends and family?
And that brings me to my wish this Christmas. This Christmas
I want one to remember.
Santa,
I want snow deep enough to go out and make a snowman in. I
want to get to ride and see the Christmas lights in all the towns, especially
in a carriage along the way. You see, Sheri doesn’t drive at night anymore, and
I can’t now either. I want my wife to get the 1 present she has always asked me
for that I’ve never been able to deliver. Surely you remember that one, don’t
you?
God,
I want you to look after Sheri, especially going forward.
You see, she never flinched when we got the 2 diagnoses. As a matter of a fact
she started researching and trying to find any way medically that we could make
this better. Besides the Mountain Dew, Namenda and lumbar punctures, we haven’t
really found anything else. That woman means the world to me and you know she
loves You more than life itself. So whatever you choose to do, if you would
make her life a bit easier going forward that would be my greatest present. The
shop has become her pride and joy, so if you will guide her and make it
successful so that she can continue to have a reason to move forward that would
be great.
Lastly, maybe to both of you, if you would find it in your
hearts to do so, show someone the cure for both of these diseases. There are a
lot of brilliant docs out there and I’m sure somewhere a Godly one can be found
who would handle your precious gift with love and care. I don’t want anyone
else to have to deal with this. The frustrations and confusion continues to
grow little by little. I’m glad I can still work for now as it helps to keep my
mind distracted from what is ahead of me. If I could be blessed by the gift of
healing that would be great, but if not, will you prevent someone else from
having to go through either of these?
I know some people see one or both of you as fictional. Me,
I don’t. Santa will always be in the hearts of good people, bringing hope for a
brighter future and God, well, you’ve proven yourself over and over to me
through the years, proving I can be loved even when I could never deserve it
from anyone.
Thanks to both of you for all you’ve given me through the
years, and hopefully, for many more years to come.
Sincerely,
Keith Moreland
